Thursday, June 28, 2007

A new beginning

Perhaps, in a new place, I will feel free to post, to vent, to purge and let things out that need to be let out.

I told Brenna tonight that I just feel so hopeless... I don't know why, exactly. Losing Bruce and Melissa was one part of it. Money is another. But there's just this cloud over my mind, a weariness and fear and wondering. Where am I going? How will I react on the journey, and when I arrive? How can I make up to Paul for the things he's lost in following me on what was, ultimately, a fool's journey?

I just don't know. I can't seem to pull anything out of the muck and mire of my brain. Maybe I just need to keep typing until something comes out... anything...

2 comments:

linderlinder said...

I'm more sure every day that we are two of the triplets. I've ben weary and wandering feeling too.

Love you.

Brenna said...

I keep finding hope in these deep dark pits of despair I get myself into.

I'm finding it so much easier to write out the hard shit in this more private of places... I hope you find that too.

*hugs*